Larry is popular

The editors at Scuttlebutt utilize several search engine tools to stay abreast of the sport on the Internet, and these tools have some key words to help them along. We recently added “Larry Ellison” as one of the search phrases, and have quickly learned at how small the America’s Cup is to Larry’s world.

You know you are really somebody when there is a site called “Larry Ellison's Fake Blog.” For now, it is entertaining to learn about the larger side of Larry’s life. However, we are not sure how much longer this will be fun.

What is tinyurl?

While recently attending the opening ceremonies of a national championship, enjoying the good company of some new and old friends, an unexpected question was asked by three different people within the span of fifteen minutes: “what is tiny-earl?” The first time it was asked, the question needed to be repeated thrice before figuring what they were inquiring about. Long story short, folks were wondering about a website address frequently seen in Scuttlebutt: tinyurl.com.

This site is one of the many wonders of the Internet that does stuff for free. When a website address gets too long, it often causes problems with our format. The tinyurl.com website has a tool that effectively turns long addresses into shorter ones, thus the name “Tiny URL.” An example in Issue 2419 was the North Sails announcement in the SAILING SHORTS section, where we needed to shorten the original 116-character web address:

Too long:
http://na.northsails.com/news.taf?_function=detail&news_uid1=361&_UserReference=7F00000146EDDDFA566145074F7446D1C010

Just right:
http://tinyurl.com/yvsu3p

Worms and Birds

Some of our most interesting reader exchanges come from the Curmudgeon’s Observations, with one coming from Issue 2417 regarding the following:

“The early worm gets eaten by the bird, so sleep late.”

Most of the reader mail had to do with how the “early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.” However, one exchange in particular showed our well versed our readers were in things other than sailing (and how little we know about birds and worms):

‘Butthead: I have to comment on your advice about staying in bed increasing the chances of survival for worms. The early bird gets the worms because there is less competition from other birds. Later there are more birds competing therefore the chance of the worm being eaten is proportionally higher. The worm should surface early and then burrow to increase the chance of survival. Please stick to journalism - do not become a strategist!

Curmudgeon: Along with more birds, there are now more worms later in the day, thus improving the worm's odds for survival. Assuming that the early worms out were eaten, then one might assume that the meal habits of the bird have concluded, and that they have moved on to gathering sticks and leaves for their nest. If the worm sleeps in, they have possibly survived this cycle.

‘Butthead: The worms come out early to catch the dew and the cooler temperatures.
The temperature rises as the day progresses. The worms start to dry out and they disappear under ground. That's why the birds have to get up early to find more food. So if you are a worm and you get up late you get eaten or dried out. Less chance of survival. Irrefutable I think!

Curmudgeon: You win!

‘Butthead: Good.

Hollywood Squares

At the end of each issue of the Scuttlebutt newsletter is the Curmudgeon's Observation. To pick the ones that are used, we cull through a lengthy list of suggestions. We often find ones that we feel are great, but just do not fit into the format.

We weren't sure how the list below would go over in the newsletter, and rather than deleting them, we thought we would share them here for those readers that remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course:

Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.

Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should
you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy it sure seems that way sometimes.

Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.

Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?
A. Rose Marie: No wait until morning.

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weave: My sense of decency.

Q. In Hawaii, does it take more than three words to say "I Love You"?
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and "I Can't Get Enough"?
A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing-old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.

Q. Paul why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.

Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.

Q. Can boys join the Campfire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?

Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.

Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?

Q. When a couple has a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car; the rest is up to him.

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.

Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point, and laugh.

Evolve or Die

Seems pretty harsh, but that was the question that likely faced many of the pram sailors in San Francisco. Long the bastion of the El Toro boat, this 8-foot singlehander was both a stepping stone on the junior sailing training trail and also a means for the adults to go racing without first having to pay for sandwiches and slip fees. However, the Optimist class has been rolling west, having found some footing in the Pacific Northwest, and was sliding south. The strong winds and open water of SF Bay was well suited to the Opti, and the desire for promising junior sailors to travel much beyond the city limits didn’t exist with the El Toro, but did with its nationally and internationally recognized brethren

For junior sailors at most clubs in San Francisco, the transition to the Optimist is complete. However, Richmond Yacht Club on the Bay’s eastside is the home of the El Toro, and it is there that both worlds are currently co-existing. The senior side of the story will remain in the El Toro, as the size of most adults preclude the use of the smaller Optimist, plus the class rules state that the boat is only for sailors under the age of 16 years. For junior sailors, however, it is a personal decision, and for the time being, it is dividing up the troops. Kids that are content with the low-key program provided by the club are staying with ole faithful, while those aspiring for more are finding the need to make the change to the Opti.

Both the junior and senior ranks recently held their North Americans, with the numbers in the low thirties at each. Respectable for now. Click here for photos from the adult event along with results and class info.

Funny signs

Funny Sign Friday:

This week's soapbox

We really need to get off our soapbox about bad event website organization. As we see it, all the info needs to be in one place, with easy navigation to go from one item to the next. You should be able to go to the event website and find important items such as NOR, Event Schedule, Results, Reports, Photos, etc. Maybe an event doesn’t want to host a website. No problem, just add a directory off the class or event host site. Bottom line is that you should be able to distribute a single URL to anyone interested, and that when going to that site, the viewer easily can find all the info. Also, every item on the site needs to have a direct link, so that if someone wants just the results, they can have it.

Sample event site: http://www.eventwebsite.com
Results only: http://www.eventwebsite.com/results

Or

Event site on YC: http://www.yachtclubsite.com/events/07/baglenationals
Results only: http://www.yachtclubsite.com/events/07/baglenationals/results

Excuse the interruption

We began in June putting together the PHOTOS OF THE WEEK feature, which has allowed us to share many of the great images we receive. From around the sport, and around the globe, these images often capture the new, the odd, the courageos, and the humorous moments in sailing.

Among the many hats the publisher at Scuttlebutt wears is to edit this feature, but last week he was wearing his vacation hat, enjoying a week out of the office, firmly planted at the San Diego YC outpost on Catalina Island (photo). Anyway, long story short, we did not have the POTW feature last week, but look for it to return again this week.

‘Butthead Etiquette

There are lots of separate email addresses here at Scuttlebutt World Headquarters, but the one that gets the most mail is for the Editor. Each morning, we download over 120 notes to the Editor’s email address, and the flow doesn’t stop until late in the day. Of the notes received, many of them are ‘Letters to the Editor’ which comment about something in the Scuttlebutt newsletter. Our policy is to publish every letter that is relevant, but also to reply to each letter received. It might not always happen, but we sure do try, as we figure that if you took the time to write to us, we should take the time to write back. Call it ‘butthead etiquette.

Notice to Mariners

Newport, RI -- With 455 entries for the 2007 Optimist New England Championship hosted this week at Sail Newport on August 7-9, you figure that there has to be a Notice to Mariners issued for the Narragansett Bay area. That many boats must fill up the bay, and god-forbid you happen to be downwind of the course when a big blow comes through. With 60% chance of rain on Wednesday accompanied by high winds and scattered thunderstorms, visions of tumbleweeds bounding across the barren desert comes to mind. And these are just daytime concerns.

The risk seems high of getting trampled at the Ryan Family Amusement center on Thames Street, which claims to have a “games room featuring over 50 of the hottest/ coolest arcade & skill games.” That would seem to be of interest to at least some of the 455 Opti sailors. No doubt the ‘buttheads of Team One Newport are running low on youth sized everything, and who knows how long the line will be this week at the Cold Stone Creamery on Bellevue Ave. Rough goings could extend to the gas stations too, as an Opti fleet of this size must also carry with it a flotilla of Mommy Boats (aka, support RIBs).

Where were the CNN warnings for the locals when they needed them?

Is Rolex a ‘butthead?

We would love for Rolex to partner with Scuttlebutt. We have chatted with them in the past, and their comments have usually centered on an avoidance for online entities. We assured them that we would toss our phony Rolex watches, but so far no movement. And while time will tell if the rumors of Rolex being the next title sponsor of the America’s Cup challenger series (formerly the Louis Vuitton Cup) are true, the announcement below shows at least that the Swiss watchmaker is not sitting on their hands. Maybe this is also an alliance with the folks that make the cheap knock-offs:


ROLEX becomes Official Timepiece of the Royal Hong Kong YC

August 6, 2007
In Hong Kong, ROLEX today celebrated the start of a long-term partnership with the Royal Hong Kong Yacht Club (RHKYC), one of Asia's premier sailing and rowing clubs, which over its rich 150 year history has been a focal point for active and competitive oarsmen and sailors through to the present day.

The initial four-year partnership will feature ROLEX as the Official Timepiece for all of RHKYC's activities, with the China Sea Race and the San Fernando Race, the Club's biennial races to the Philippines, becoming part of ROLEX's distinguished portfolio of international offshore races. Click here for more.

A beer before it starts